Meanwhile, TJ is doing great! He's at such a fun age and I love all the time that I get to spend with him. I can't believe he's already 5 months old today. Sometimes I wish I could just freeze time with him at this age.
Hands
Friday, June 19, 2015
I'm Back
It's been a while since I've written here and it was a good break, but I'm at a point right now where I'm happy to be back. TJ is 5 months today and I stopped breastfeeding this past week so that we can start preparing for our next IVF round (whenever we decide that will be). Stopping breastfeeding has brought back so many bad memories of having to dry up like I had to after delivering Nathan. I'd say that I've been pretty depressed this week. Everything reminds me of Nathan and makes me miss him. How can it possibly be that the last time we've seen our older son is over 20 months ago? I think the thought of having to go through another IVF round is depressing as well. I'm so over the infertility crap. I am very grateful for our two blessings so far, though. Ugh, the roller coaster.
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Hi Julie
ReplyDeleteI found your blog by chance and I would like to say your sons are beautiful.
My husband and I lost our baby girl in May 2012. She was three months old and doctors she passed away from SIDS.
We had our son in October 2013, and he is doing so well. I commend you for this blog; losing our daughter was something that was so painful that to this day I don't talk about it to anyone except my husband and even then I don't have words.
Having another baby so soon after her was difficult in that as he was reaching milestones I would constantly think about how she would have been at that specific age. How old would she have been when she started walking, talking, etc. The thing that made me the saddest was finishing his first year baby book because she didn't have one. I never made one, I couldn't imagine having a book that ended at three months. So I stored everything of hers, from the baby shower to her last outfit and it hurts to look at it sill.
I don't know if it is any comfort but I like to think now that Luka and Nate are friends, little angels watching over us waiting to be with us again. Its my only comfort to believe I will see her again.
It would be lovely to hear from you, and once again congratulations on TJ, he is a little heart breaker!
Have a great day,
Abi
I have just read your first entry and my son was born on October 10 2013. It makes me incredibly and so sad deep in my heart that exactly a day after you went through your loss, my husband and I were celebrating our boy. I will never understand why things happen, my heart will be sad for a while knowing this.
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